Husband and Wife speak of experience with Penile Implant

Dear Readers:
I've been corresponding with Beth & Court and they wish to share their experiences. Court received his implant, the end of April 2007. His doctor was Doctor Paul Perito from Coral Gables, Florida. Dr Perito performs hundreds of implants annually and is a highly skilled surgeon who does a lot implant surgery. Beth and Court are a loving couple who feel that having a full sex life is an important part of their marriage. It is the way men and women can express their love to each other and give of themselves. They, like my wife and I, have suffered with Erectile Dysfunction for many many years. After all the other treatment for ED failed them and us, we, both couples looked to penile implant surgery as the finale solution to fix that all important sexual part of our lives. But as we've found, some doctors view the surgery with higher expectations than what the majority of patients are going to achieve in real life. What both couples hope to achieve is for you the reader to learn from us. We want you going into the decision with a realistic knowledge of what an implant can acomplish and what are its limitations. No ED treatment up to this point is a full proof solution. I was told that I would not lose any length from erections with the implant. In reality, I'm about a 1/2 inch short in length, but the circumference of my penis has gained at least a 1/4 inch in girth. In time as I use the implant, things may change. Am I satisfied with my present results. My answer would be an unqualifying yes. Just understand going in, your result might be diferent than what your doctor may optimistically tell you. But do keep an open mind.
Regards to all and thank you Court and Beth for your candor and help. As I've said before. I would like this blog to be a learning resource that tells it like it is. Please send me your stories and be honest. No bragging allowed and no flaming other posters.
Thanks all
Bob



From: Badnessneeds@yahoo.com [mailto:badnessneeds@yahoo.com] Sent: Thursday, July 05, 2007 4:59 PMTo: Bob BaconSubject: Re: How is your husbands progress

Dear Bob,I'd be honored if you chose to cobble together some of the things I've written and put it up on your blog. It needn't be anonymous, I am not ashamed or feel uncomfortable discussing this subject from ANY angle. I'll discuss any aspect of this from the physical, the emotional, the roller coaster ride for the last 17 years that lead us here. I consider my husband (and you) to be the bravest, most committed guys I know. I could not conceive of a life that didn't include feeling my husband inside me - there is no substitute for making love with the person you love most and like best in the world. Nothing I've written is off limits. I wish we'd taken some photos of Courtney during all this, but it just never occurred to me. Last night, after a warming and massage, then a tugging and a pump-up of the device, I can say that Courtney has, in the last month, regained 1/4 of an inch (I only let him measure every few weeks, so as to avoid yet another dick obsession). It's not all of what he lost, but by the same token, let's get real - the pills didn't work, I couldn't find a tri-mix formulation that worked for more that a few minutes so "the old Courtney" lives on only in my memory. I was never going to get that back, so I might as well get over it and get creative (like smallish cock rings worn behind the head). This is what we have now, and a quarter inch beats a poke in the eye with a sharp stick, wouldn't you agree?By the way, Courtney learned that "come hither" trick with the finger a few years ago, too. What's so hilarious is that when he hits it, even if I am in the middle of a sentence, I just stop talking like a doll who's string finally wound all the way back in. We now refer to it as "that place that makes me go quiet".As for creating a place for people to go for information - all the shit the doctors just can't seem to bring themselves to get honest about - if you hadn't started your blog, we would have. We can find a plethora of guys who have either had the surgery just recently or are scheduled to have it shortly. What we need to do is encourage a mentorship program - guys who've lived and loved with hydraulics who can help when one of the newbies wants to jump off a bridge because he's left with a lot less than he remembers it being.... So let's keep going - we need to be the voices of sanity, advice and reason in the year to follow - that's where the internet is sorely lacking in resources. So why not have it be a group like us? We're significantly better educated on the subject than most. Courtney and I will help you and Ann in any way we can.
Beth

Bob Bacon wrote:
Beth:

Thank you for the email and for your frankness and no it doesn’t bother me at all. It’s refreshing. Ann and I aren’t supposed to do today what we did, but she couldn’t stand looking at my erection and having had to do without for 5 weeks, I let her climb aboard. It was wonderful. She had a very nice orgasm, but I got just a little sore and decided not to push my luck. I understand perfectly what you are saying. Ann my wife, loves having me curl my finger and give her a come hither with my finger over her g spot while performing oral. It drives her wild. I love your inventiveness and as I was reading your letter, I was thinking along the same lines as you came up with. The studded cock ring was ingenious. I wish you and Court the very best. Making love is the glue that keeps the marriage strong. I’m about a half inch short of what I had, but I know now that with what I have left that I still can do the job so I’m just going to try and take it in stride. I do have a quarter inch of thickness that I didn’t have before. I do wish that my surgery had occurred a week earlier than it did. This resort would make any couple feel pretty frisky. And without the kids around, no interruptions, it’s perfect. The weather is perfect and we’re going to watch the fireworks from our boat tonight. Coming down here, we got to within 20 minutes of the resort and the boat started feeling really different. I couldn’t stop as I was stuck in traffic in a hard poring rain. When we got to the resort, I checked my trailer and the right tire was completely worn out and all of the tread was gone. I’m glad it didn’t happen to me at 70 mph. It would be a lousy way to start a vacation after destroying a boat. One of the bearings disinagrated into little pieces inside the hub. I’ve got a new hub and bearings kit being Fed Ex’ed to me for two day delivery. We have met some really nice people here at the resort. Normally we come here over Labor Day weekend. But now my wife and I think we’re going to come down here 4th of July week as well. Friends of mine who retired to Florida keep wanting my wife and I to join them when we retire. That’s going to be quite a few years from now. We’re still kids. At least I still think so. Keep up working with Court, and he should be back to normal in no time. Like you said, I followed the same regimen that you folks followed. There’s a reason for nightly erections in men and it has to do with oxygenation of the tissues as well as keeping the tissue stretched out. One of the things I learned after I became a juvenile diabetic was to get ambitious, and really take good care of myself. Watching what I eat, exercise and monitoring my blood sugars closely. Even though I have kept good care of myself, the diabetes over time nicks you a little at a time. This implant is going to allow me to continue loving my best friend. Court is truly blessed with having you as his wife Beth. If you ever want to contribute anonymously and tell your story on the blog I’m keeping, I would appreciate it. I’m trying to help other couple learn from my experiences as well as from other men if I can. The doctors don’t tell the whole story. If I can obtain enough stories, I’d like to incorporate it into a web site of truthful information for men and their partner’s looking into penile implants, so that they can make an informed decision. Have a happy 4th of July.

Regards
Bob




From: Badnessneeds@yahoo.com [mailto:badnessneeds@yahoo.com] Sent: Wednesday, July 04, 2007 2:29 PMTo: Bob BaconSubject: Re: How is your husbands progress

Dear Bob,Yeah, our surgeon told us the same thing, that we shouldn't lose any length because whether it was only 3 minutes from a shot of tri-mix or using the vacuum pump, I never let Courtney go more than a few days without an erection, no matter how brief. He was 5 inches to start - perfect for me. Courtney had testicular seminoma (it left a perfect place to put the pump!). It's not just the loss of length - that really is not the issue for me. A couple of years ago, I started becoming more interested in developing the sensitivity of my g-spot. I'd had occasional instances of mind-blowing orgasms and it took me a little while to put A with B. After that, I bought a few books on the subject, and started (with Courtney's blessing and assistance) to develop better control, to learn to "listen" to just the signals my g-spot was sending and how to use my muscles to bring my g-spot more into play during intercourse. It didn't take long to realize the coronal ring of the glans penis was the lynchpin to involving my g-spot. So for me, I wasn't solely upset by the loss of that inch - I was devastated at the loss of the engorgement of the glans. Since you mentioned that you and you wife had played around a bit, I'm sure you also know that above the ring of opening muscles, the tissues of the vagina do not perceive stimulation the same way as do the skin on your arm, or the tip of your nose. It's very difficult to describe, but pressure seems to be the most important stimulus. So when I would squeeze my muscles to bring Courtney's glans into hard contact with my g-spot, nothing happened. I could squeeze him and feel absolutely nothing up there. I felt him perfectly but only at the opening ring of muscles. I was devastated. I didn't know if I could go back to an orgasm that relied solely on my clitoris again, after everything Courtney and I had worked so diligently to learn about those bundles of nerves I'd recently discovered.Day before yesterday, I came up with an idea on my way home from work and I text messaged Court and asked him what he thought and he (of course) said "Do it!" I stopped by an adult shop near our home and looked at all the different cock rings. I knew that I didn't want to use a cock ring at the base of his penis, but I found one company that makes very stretchy silicone rings with small balls embedded in them and one of them was small enough to fit just behind the glans penis. Filled with trepidation, we gave it a try. It was just enough to scrape my g-spot and was the right size that not only did it not move or come off, it did not prevent Courtney from ejaculating. So at least for the nonce, we may have found a solution to helping me "feel" my husband deep inside me again.We have decided that we will continue our regimen until at least this autumn: we have a buckwheat neck ring that can be heated in the microwave, so we start with 10 minutes of warmth, then I massage the whole area, including perineum using both lotioned hands and a Hitachi-style massage wand for about 10-15 minutes. I follow that with hot wet compresses, mopping up the excess lotion, dry him off and while I re-heat his buckwheat ring, Courtney does his tugging exercises. He says they seem to be much more effective now that he's changed his style a bit. He makes sure he has a good grasp on not just the skin, but the implant too, bringing it down as far into the penis as safely as possible.I know I got kind of graphic on all this - if that bothers you, I apologize in advance. But I can't possibly be the only woman on the planet to feel like this, to mourn this loss, to become very inventive in seeking solutions (and occasionally crying in my coffee).

Courtney has his surgery done by Paul Perito at Coral Gables Hospital– the man responsible for about 50% of the implants done in the US and the golden boy of Coloplast. He did not address the loss of length in advance, and for that I am angry – but because, like you, Courtney was sexually active right up until his surgery, he says we have ever reasonable expectation to regain the length that’s been lost. In my reading, I found one interesting thing – did you know that the European Union’s version of the AMA published a position paper stating that all penile implant recipients should be counseled extensively regarding the loss of length associated with receiving an implant? Interesting, huh?

Have a wonderful vacation – we’re just hangin’ around the shanty, watching movies and writing letters to friends, as I am doing now. Please give our best wishes to your wife.Beth (and Courtney – I read this to him before I hit the SEND button!)
Beth Crosby & Courtney Hazelton

Bob Bacon wrote:

Beth &Court:
I've been watching your posts and really feel your pain. To have your hopes demolished like you have is very difficult. I have been in contact withDan J and we've been corresponding back andforth. He to has lost several inches in length.Dan had a radical Prostatectomy last year and was rendered impotent as a result. I jumped my doctor about why where men who had a prostatectomy losing so much length with the implant. I understand about the loss in length that the prostate covers. Most prostates are like a large egg in shape and size, and the ureter passes through the prostate almost through the longest portion of the prostate. I worked 17 years in clinical pathology and I would receive the specimens from the operating room.weI would do a description of the specimen and then dissect the specimen for further study under the microscope after processing. So I asked my doctor if this was the reason for the loss and he told me no. He told me that doctors really don't know why one in three patients who have loss their prostate, experience significant loss in length. I told him about my blog and the Yahoo penile implants site and it seemed that people who had loss in length and were upset because no one had informed them exactly what to expect. That the doctors had toldthem to expect the best possible outcomes and just barely mentioned to them what the worst outcome would be. When I talked to him about what I should expect, he told me that I shouldn't expect to lose any length at all. That I may gain some length because I had been experiencing sexual relations up to my day of surgery. From what I have heard and read, just about everyone loses a little from the head of the penis because the head of the penis doesn't become engorged with blood,so that's at least a quarter to a half an inch of lose in length. I just started inflating my implant and I have gained a quarter inch in the girth but have lost almost a half inch in length. Dan has had significant loss of a couple inches.You folks have also lost significant length to the point of it having a significant effect on you both enjoying sexual relations. I really feel that my doctor would not have been up front with me either if I had lost my prostate and then opted for an implant. My doctor explained to me that they resect the bladder and reattach the bladder lower in the abdomen to regain the lost space where the prostate covered previously. After giving it much thought, I wonder if the internal organs don't push the bladder back up into the abdomen pulling back on the urethra and pulling the penis back into the body causing a lost of length that is in reality inside the man's body instead of outside. That is my best guestimate of the causer of Court's and Dan's lose of length. That lost length is somewhere. The penis doesn't just shortened or gain in length. It's fixed during puberty for the length a man will have forthe rest of his life. You and Court have something really special together just as my wife and I share. People have some really goofy ideas about what pleases a women. After a whole lot of study, the average length of a man's penis is 5.1inches. In playing around, my wife and I know that the depth of her vagina is 5 and a half inches deep. And yes, the vagina may stretch to accommodate something longer, each women is different just as we guys are different. When you both fit perfectly together, nothing can bebetter. Beth, did Court have his surgery at UniversityHospital in Iowa City? If not, you might want to set up an appointment there with a Urologist to see what options can be done for restoring Court's length. Like I said, Court's loss in length didn't disappear into thin air. It's hiding somewhere. I once applied there and was made an offer at the same time as the University ofMissouri and that was back when Iowa was being hit hard by the farm crisis and the state froze salaries across the board. I was given a tour ofthe hospital and it's an impressive hospital.
. My wife and I are on vacation this week. We're just outside of Branson Missouri vacationing on Table Rock Lake and just enjoying each other. We're at the 5 week point in my recovery so we're just enjoying each other in other ways. Please stay in touch, and email Daniel at: (omitted) and you will find him to have a great outlook on life and very easy to correspond with.

Sincerely yours,
Bob Bacon
Bbacon15@mchsi.com